Back to School

Today was the first day back at school after the summer break, and as you can imagine last night saw the usual mix of emotions - sadness that the holidays are over, anticipation over what is in store for the year ahead, and anxiety over which teacher they may get (especially hoping it is not 'the mean one' that has been dreaded all summer). However, it wasn't the children experiencing this range of emotions. It was me.

Every time the kids go back to school I experience the same feelings I used to experience when I was a kid.

The summer holidays are book-ended by significant 'night-befores' - Christmas Eve and first-day-of-school-eve - one the antithesis of the  other. Hopefully we are all familiar with the excitement that welcomes Christmas Eve. I once thought that we were also all familiar with the dread that welcomes the night before school, but I am quickly learning through my children that that is not the case.

During the last couple of weeks I have been doing what I can to prepare the kids for school. Apart from all the practical things, I have been ensuring they have done all they wanted to do over summer, asking them what they are most excited about for school and preparing them for not being with the friends or the teacher they want for the year. However, I slowly realised that this was more for my benefit than for theirs.

Perhaps it is a good reflection on their school, or on them, that they do not seem bothered about going back to school at all. In fact, when I parked the car outside the gates this morning to ask them how they were feeling they said 'excited', 'happy', 'great'. One of them eventually said she was a little nervous, but she had a big smile on her face at the time. What is that about?

It has caused me to ponder what it was about school that made me hate going back. My favourite years of school were without question my last 2 years of high school. I came into my own in those years, both academically and socially. I think I had started to figure myself out a bit better, plus I had some good teachers and a very good group of friends.

Ironically though, I think my high school was probably the worst of all the schools that I went to. My Primary school and Intermediate were considered better schools overall.

Intermediates are weird schools aren't they? Why we separate those two years from primary and high school I will never know.

During my first year of intermediate I had 'the mean teacher'. She was absolutely awful. I don't know why some people become teachers if they clearly can't stand children.  I honestly can't remember her smiling that whole year. My main memories of her are she stunk of smoke, had the voice to match her smoking habit and she would use any opportunity to mock or yell at any student.

I was a dream student. The goody two-shoes. Any teacher would love to have me in their class. But even I cannot remember her saying a single good word to me, but I sure remember the bad ones. (If my kids ever have a teacher like that - we will be having words!)

Thankfully, the next year I had an excellent teacher and a great group of friends. We laughed a lot, played heaps of sport and I really enjoyed learning. It is interesting that in my memory, when I think of form one it is always dark, but form two is always sunny. Suffice to say, apart from those two years in high school, the last year of Intermediate was one of my favourites.

Throughout primary and intermediate I had the same best friend. I looked up to her and she knew it. I wouldn't call her a bully, but she certainly had a dominant personality, which in hindsight, wasn't a good mix with me. But when you're that young, it's just great to have a best friend and I have lots of good memories with her, and lots of great memories of our time in Primary School together. It was a great school.

So I didn't have a school experience that was any better or worse than anyone else - so why the 'before-school-dread'?

Well, I have the answer everyone. The reason is choice. Freedom. Call it what you will, but the fact is that no matter what, I HAD TO go to school, and I hate HAVING to do something.

I go to work now of course. I suppose I do have to earn a living and there may be a parts of my job that I don't like sometimes. But I know that if I really wanted to leave, I could. Nothing is chaining me to that desk but my own choices.

I do need to work, but I am blessed to be in a position where what I do for work really is up to me. (A product of a good education!) Don't get me wrong, I'll never be an astronaut or cure cancer, but if I really wanted a change, I know I could find something else. It would not be an easy decision to make but it is still within my power to make that decision.

Every weekday I make the CHOICE to go to work. I therefore make the choice to do that work well and enjoy myself while doing it.

My kids do not have the luxury of having a choice regarding whether to go to school or not, or even which school they go to. But they do have the luxury of getting an education, making friends, growing their characters, and creating lasting memories - good or bad. Perhaps they are already smarter than me and can appreciate that. If that's the case, I'm not surprised they were looking forward to going back to school.

(And if you want a glimpse at what we did on holiday - check it out here.)